Sunday, February 27, 2011

58&59-365 A nice weekend

We had some old friends in town this wekend so there isn't much to talk abour or to post, except that it's great to spend time with people who've known you for almost a quarter of a century.

This is a shot of a trail on our local nature preserve. 

This little feline was sleeping in a store front window. The store sells "antiques and collectables" but is mainly a collection of old bric brac. The kitty (and I actually think there's more than one) live at the store. This cutie-pie was napping in the shell of an old television.
Since I'm posting today's Proj365 today, rather than tomorrow like I usually do, I'm a day ahead. Yippeee! I think I'm going to take tomorrow off!

Saturday, February 26, 2011

57-365 The waxy lady (and 54-365 Oops, I missed one!)

Things had been getting out of hand down below recently. (WARNING: Gentlemen, this may be TMI. Continue reading at your own risk.) I hadn't been to the waxy place in months, dealing with the issue with razors and slathers of Bikini Zone cream. (Shudder.)

I used to have a good aesthetician. Her rate was a scandal  -- $58 + tip for a deep bikini wax! -- (Gents, for those of you still reading that's taking off everything front to back but leaving something like a stripe or a soul patch around the goodies), her place was in another town, but the results were good and the pain was bearable. Then she left the salon and I decided to give the "new girl" a try. Holy-fuckin'-mother-of-gawd was that a mistake. I have never, ever, never in my life had someone stop what they were doing in the middle of a procedure, ANY procedure -- and I've had root planing and scaling at the freakin' dentists office! -- because I couldn't take the pain. But young chicky-poo at the salon almost killed me. Ladies, have you ever had someone inexperienced and TIMID attempt to rip your short hairs out? Well my sisters, let me point you down a better path; run, don't walk out of the door. I now insists my waxy lady to be AT LEAST 45 years old with AT LEAST 20 years experience. That's all I'm sayin'.

So I'm in search of a new salon. Spring is upon us and I enjoy frequenting my local nude resort. I cannot go looking like I'm either diseased (razor bumps and burn) or un-evolved. Some of you may have noticed I'm a brunette with thin, pale, and translucent Scottish skin. Shaving just don't cut it. And I don't want to spend the money on laser. And I can't even fathom attempting to "self-wax." WTF.

Just when I was about to despair, guess what? A new place opened five blocks from my house. I called. I questioned. I screened. And I decided to give the place a try.
What a delightful surprise! First, the place was awesome! Small but "spa-like" with all of the wonderful scents, and colors, and organic whats-its all over the place. The aesthetician was terrific! She used a hard wax technique and it was the least pain I've ever experienced. She also told me their story: she and her partner both lost their jobs at local resort salons. After more than a year of trying to find new ones, they eventually decided to open their own place. And the tourists' loss is my gain!

Oh, and the rate? $30 + tip for a deep bikini including the back! I know, right?! Now I just have to help these ladies build their business so they STAY in business! Referrals will abound.

On another quick note, I realized that I'd gotten my Proj365 numbers screwed up and missed Tuesday. This is 54-365. As you can see, the shot wasn't exactly memorable but never-the-less, here it is.

Fresh veggies! These babies were on their way to the oven to be roasted, then served with Italian turkey sausage and pasta in a lemony picatta-type sauce. One of the great things about not knowing how to really cook Italian food is that I make things up all the time.
It was delicious!

PS -- And the squirrels chewed their way back into the carport attic. We're now assuming there are babies in there but we can't quite tell. So the score is Squirrels -- 2, Vince -- 0.

Friday, February 25, 2011

56-365 Squirrels - 1, Vince - 0

So it appears we have squirrels in the attic of our carport.

Damn.

This won't do. Vince discovered it last week and sure enough, the little buggers found a tiny hole in the eaves and have set up house-keeping. And we're not squirrel killers. Hell, I'm not even a squirrel terrorist. So trying to figure out how to get the fluffy-tailed rats out of the attic is becoming quite the challenge.

As of yesterday, Vince was tossing out ideas and I was shooting them down one after the other. Some of them (the ones that involved smoke or firecrackers) I just thought we'd have a hard time explaining to the insurance adjuster. Others ("Hey Ivey, what if we put a cat up there! The cat could run the squirrels out and then we could just get the cat!") I thought the ASPCA would frown upon. And what if the cat actually caught one? Oh, the carnage. Besides, I don't know anyone who'd let us borrow their precious pet to pop into our attic for a few hours.  Desperation seemed to be setting in.

Then we remembered we had these.
My mother-in-law gave them to us last fall when the squirrels were eating our Drake Elm. We tossed a couple of these babies into the attic and this morning, Vince reports no sounds or other activity. Could it be success? We don't know yet, but I think it's better than bringing out the heavy artillary.

We'll keep you posted......

Thursday, February 24, 2011

HNT -- Swing (and 55-365)

Happy HNT all! Don't forget to check out the rest of the nekkid-ness at Osbasso's!

Last night instead of taking pictures, we decided to checkout the new show on the Playboy Channel -- "Swing." We don't subscribe to the channel, but the first episode is available on-line.
 Overall, the show wasn't bad and the things that were, were predictable.

A) It's the Playboy Channel. OF COURSE the show is going to be pretty male centric. The break-the-ice game was the wives picking up cherries from a bowl on the ground with their mouths then running to their husbands who were sitting in chairs and dropping them in another bowl in the guy's lap. There was no conversation at all about any hesitation on his part other than asking if he thinks he might get jealous to see some other guy bang his wife.

B) It's the Playboy Channel. OF COURSE the two gals at the center of attention are going to hawt, THIN, and all in to the girl-girl action. On the upside, the rest of the cast did have a least a little physical variety, though not much in terms of race or age.

C) It's the Playboy Channel. OF COURSE the lead gal (in this episode at least) doesn't need to be articulate ("I mean, that was like, oh wow! I'm like soooooo ready for this, um, ya know, like experience!) The guy didn't either, but he did need to be ready to get it on. And he was.

But the fucking looked fun and better than the standard porn fare -- no wacky mewling sounds or odd facials. The conversations had potential to be interesting and enlightening but in the chosen format they really didn't get into anything of any depth. Mostly the experienced couples saying "Yeah, this is great; she/I was nervous at first but couldn't wait to get it on again after we tried it." The new couple saying "Yeah, I'm nervous but this is exciting; I/we can't wait to take our relationship to the next level."

On a side note, one of the up-coming couples is someone Vince and I had a date with. And yes, they are both hawt. Of course, after our date where we all appeared to have a great time, we sent a "thanks for a great evening note" and didn't hear back from them, at all, for months, leaving us baffled. They eventually sent us a note saying that they'd been busy shooting their Swing episode, they'd had a good time with us and would be happy to hang out again, but just so you know they "didn't feel any sexual chemistry." The last part, no problem. The four month delay? Yeah, gets under my skin.

Anyway, the teaser for their episode is up on the Playboy Channel website titled Kimberly and Michael. Check it out. Oh, and let me know if anything strikes you as odd.

And since I don't want to get behind here's Wednesday's project 365 photo. It's a little restaurant with the best damn high-end barbeque around. Didn't know there was such a thing, did you? Anyhow, the food was great, the atmosphere was suitably hip and trendy. And it was a delightful way to spend time with my honey!
Catch y'all later!

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

53-365 I needed a little springtime

I know some folks may be a little irked with my current flower obsession but people, I freakin' needed some springtime! Sure, sure... lots of you have it lots worse and all I can say is we've got plenty of houses for sale in good ol' sunny Florida but giddiness in Spring is usually wilted by the time 98 degree Summer rolls around.

Anywhoo, the following shots are straight from the iPhone, no tweaking at all. First, Azaleas in my yard. 
 Second, from along the bike trail a wild flowering tree with very delicate white flowers. There was no specific scent, but at this time of year my area takes on a Spring-like smell, before the heady orange blossoms show up next month or so, there's a light smell of general "flowers" in the air.
 This is a Crepe Myrtle. In February it should always be cut back in order for it to come out with some wild and showy flowers. I'll take another shot of this tree when it's in full bloom in a few weeks.
But I have needed some Springtime people. First, I can't stand to be cold and for a delicate Southern Flower like m'self, anything below 60 is cold. Second, I NEED to be outside, in the fresh air, in the open. I hate being cooped up, always have, always will. Third, the sounds of the birds are amazing right now. At this moment I have the windows wide open and the trees outside my office are full of birds making every kind of noise. The squirrels are frisky too. It rejuvenation!

I'll take a photo of the Peltafloram tree outside of my office at some point. It's deciduous and right now the old seed pods are still clinging to the tips. The new growth is poised to push them to the ground over the next few weeks and the view outside my window will radically change. Yippeeee!

And I know, some of you will have the most awesome photos of Spring in Carolina's, New England, the Mid-West, North West and California pretty soon. And I'm excited for you and sorry you have to wait so long. But personally, Spring is showing up right on time around here. And I'm as happy as I can be!

Monday, February 21, 2011

52-365 A sucker for flowers and Virginia Woolf

I am a well known sucker for flowers so you can imagine how nutsy I get in the Spring. I spotted these beauties on my bike ride yesterday morning. I think the first one is a Japanese Cherry tree but only because I know it's not a Pink Dogwood. If anyone has a clue, I'd be happy for the identification.

 One of the things I love about flowering trees is just their MASS. There is absolutely nothing subtle about a Dogwood, Cherry, Tabubia or any of the others in full bloom. Of course, they only put this show on once a year and the rest of the time we just have to wait.
 This lovely lady is a Red Camellia. I have white ones in my yard but as you can see, whoever planted these wanted it to be seen. It's a bold flower!
 And the gardener had massive waves of Azaleas as well. These seem to be leaving their peak but still. Lovely. And again, they only look like this once a year.
The afternoon was spent taking my in-laws to see a fantastic play -- Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf by Edward Albee. First, the production was superb! The performances were dead on, the set and lights we're outstanding by way of being not noticed at all.

For those of you who don't know, Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf is a comedy that is absolutely brutal and devastating. It involves a couple who've created a life of deep resentment, mutual- and self-loathing, and crushing disappointment who are engaged in a no prisoners/no mercy type of never-ending psychological warfare. One very late night, a young couple comes over for drinks and all hell breaks loose.

When it first came on the scene it was a shocking piece of theatre for it's approach to marriage, language, sexuality, and even children. And today while there might not be as much shock value at the language and what's appropriate to say on the stage, this show can still shock the hell out of an audience for it's raw power.

If you have an opportunity to see a good version of this play on the stage, I highly recommend it. Like an awesome live concert, there's nothing like the energy between the performer and the audience. Conversely, avoid a bad production at all costs. And if you're aren't into the theatre but want to see a very good version, rent the 1950s film by the same title. It stars Elizabeth Taylor, Richard, Burton, George Peppard, and Sandy Dennis.

Today, it's back to work!

Sunday, February 20, 2011

51-365 Lazy Saturday and Sunday Stealing

So after a week of big talk about "getting up on Saturday and working in the yard, damnit" we ended up blowing it off and taking the motorcycle out instead. It's finally back to great biking weather and well, we're weak. We couldn't resist.

This is Lake Whatever somewhere in Central Florida. When we ride, Vince pretty much makes all the decisions and I just on the back and take in the scenery. Good lord-y, I LUV it!

And this is my picturing taking method. Yep, whip the iPhone out of the pocket, grip it tightly, and hope to hell we don't hit a bump.
After we got back to the house we continued our irresponsible behavior. Vince had a gig last night and want to take a quick nap while I put on afternoon coffee (it's a ritual.) He wasn't in his little man-cave more than 2 minutes before he comes out, grabs me by the hand and says "I'm not sleepy; I'm horny." Upstairs we dash for more intimate adventures! Wheeee!!! After a nice time fucking and sucking, THEN he takes a nap. Ha!!

On to Sunday Stealing. I went to the site to grab the questions and there was nothing new posted for today so I scrolled through and picked another list at random. Enjoy!

1. What curse word do you use the most? Hmmmmm...  hard to say. "Fuck" is pretty high on the list but I think the more benign or actually more common. "Damn" is a favorite, especially when spoken with a thick southern drawl -- "da-umn!" "Damnit" is a pretty close second and usually comes out "Damnit boy!"

2. Do you own an iPod? I have an iPhone so yes. The irritating thing is though, last summer the thing had a meltdown and had to be completely reset, wiping out everything --  music, photos, contacts, everything. I was able to get it to re-sync the photos but never the music or contacts. At this point, I still don't have any music on my phone.

3. Do you still remember the first person you kissed? Absolutely! I remember where we were (Disneyworld), what was going on (We were on the "If You Had Wings" ride), and the drama that ensued (he was apparently "going with" another girl in my Sunday School class which I found out on the bus ride home when she was apparently very pissed off at me.) Sadly, I can't remember the young cad's name.

4. Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture? Both. I'm at a point in my life where I really enjoy taking pictures but I also LOVE being in some of them as well (e.g. HNT, photos of Vince and I on trips) I think this is actually another way of asking "do you like what you like in a photo" and in my case the answer is often yes, just not every photo. Ha!


5. Has anyone ever called you lazy? Not to my face. But I think someone would be hard pressed to make that particular accusation. Self-employed people are rarely lazy, if they are they don't eat. There are certain things I don't like to do, like clean the house, but that's not because I'm lazy, I just don't enjoy spending my time that way. So I hire someone else to clean while I go do something I DO enjoy, like write Ivey Lane posts!

6. Has anyone told you a secret this week? Does reading anonymous blogs count? No? Okay, as a general rule, I don't let people tell me secrets, not because I can't or won't keep them (I can and I do), but it's a burden I don't want to carry. I hate having information I can't use or knowing something about some third party's personal life that's none of my business.

7. What is the first thing you notice about the someone that you are attracted to? Smile.

8. What are you looking forward to? Today? Next weekend? Next month? Next summer? What? Let's not be vague here. Today I'm looking forward to going to the theatre and having dinner out. Next weekend I'm looking forward to some old friends coming in town. Next month I'm looking forward to some traveling and starting a new project. Next summer Vince and I are going to France. Good grief, I look forward to stuff all the freakin' time.

9. Do you own any band t-shirts? Ahmmmm... now that I think about it, no I don't. But I do own one John Prine sweatshirt.

10. When is the last time you slept on the floor? I think it was the last time I had a horrible flu. I finally just slept on the floor in the bathroom. TMI, right?

11. What did you do last night? Watched a History Channel show on the Ten Commandments. Then started watching a History Channel show on The Plague. All that excitement put me to sleep on the couch.

12. Do you get along better with the same sex or the opposite sex? Overall, I'd have to say opposite sex though I'm consciously working on that.

13. Who was the last person to make you mad? I don't think people "make me mad." I get frustrated sometimes and the resulting behavior can appear angry but it's really just that I don't like being held back, told what to do, limited, or interfered with in any way. (Da-umn Ivey!) Right now I'm frustrated and therefore "angry" with our elected officials, specifically the State and Federal level for trying to do all of the above.

14. Who would you want to be tied to for 24 hours? NO ONE! Please see the above. Dear god, the thought makes me hyperventilate; I think I need to stop typing and go calm down.

15. T or F: All’s fair in love and war? Big fat false. This particular phrase is used to excuse inexcusable behavior. 

16. What’s something you’ve always wanted? Wow. I can't think of anything I've "always" wanted. Oh wait! I know!! A flat stomach though I was probably 7 or 8 before I realized my tummy wasn't flat and that it mattered somehow. Alas, I'm afraid it's not to be. Sigh.

17. Do you enjoy spending time with your mother? Hahahahahaha! Yes. And no. Seriously, you'd have to know my mother to understand why that's so fuckin' funny.

18. Do you want a bright yellow ‘06 mustang? Why would I want a four year old Mustang? And I'm not a fan of the color yellow. Now a '66 Mustang, red with white canvas drop top and white leather seats? Sign me up.

19. Where is/are your best friend(s)? Downstairs in his man-cave.
20. Would you rather swim in the ocean or a lake? I love swimming in lakes. Those folks who get all "but what about the alligators?!" need to STFU. My usual response is that more people in Florida will die from drowning so the question really should be "what about the water!?" 

That's it folks! I hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend and your week!

Saturday, February 19, 2011

50-365 Somewhere in America

Thanks for hanging in with me on Project365. I realize that I need to expand my subject matter but for today's shot you get yet another view of the bike trail. Sigh.
As I mentioned a few posts ago, I'm adding a series I'm going to call "Somewhere in America." We travel quite a bit and looking through my archives, I do have a few pretty cool shots in some pretty interesting places. All of the photos I'll use were taken by me and over the past few years. I'll let you know what it's a photo of, and possibly why I thought it was interesting, though I'm not going to tell you the exact locations. If you guess, I'll fess up.

This is a shot of an abandoned homestead. All over the country there are dilapidated ruins of someones' former homes disintegrating into dust. I'm fascinated by this. Someone chose the location, procured the materials, then built the structure. They then lived, worked, loved, fucked, fought, laughed and cried here. And then they, or their descendants, left.
My first shot in the Somewhere in America series was in this post and a totally different situation. In the above photo, one assumes the owner/builder wanted to be there; in the previous picture from a few weeks ago, the person who had that home built and the person who lived in it were definitely NOT the same person. In this one, the fact that it was abandoned and falling into ruin makes me feel sad. In the other, knowing the story, I feel happy and satisfied.  

Have a great weekend, folks! Vince and I spent last night with some old friends, will spend today working in the yard, and tomorrow is a trip to the theatre. We're taking the in-laws and the show stars a good friend of ours. And of course, there will be a little sexy thrown in. ;)

Friday, February 18, 2011

49-365 Primordial mist (and Sex at Dawn book review)

The weather in Florida is in that Winter/Spring transition that can make for some rockin' cool photos. These two, taken as usual on our morning bike ride, reminded me of that "dawn of time" essence -- quite, still, peaceful. (BTW -- this shot was taken directly into the sun with my iPhone.)
This thick, pea-soup like fog burned off in about 30 minutes.
And as you can see from the first photo, dawn was wayyyy gone by the time we made it to the trail.
On to the book -- Sex at Dawn

First, some folks subscribe to the theory that whatever you create in your mind, manifests in reality. In other words, if you think about it (in a certain way), it shows up. They usually use this theory to promote the idea of wealth or love or jobs or material possessions but some folks believe it also can apply to the weather, or even time itself. If this is true, then the scenes above make perfect sense because I've been thinking about the dawn of time, and how we became who we are, quite intensely lately

But I don't actually subscribe to that theory. My belief is that when your mind becomes fixated, or aware, or interested in something (or some state of being), you start to see patterns or examples of that thing everywhere. The misty morning didn't come about because I "manifested" it, I noticed it, and applied that thought to it, because it's been on my mind

And that is why I think the cultural and scientific shift that the authors of Sex at Dawn are trying to promote is so very important. Many people look around at sex and relationships, especially their own, and the see evidence that supports their own point of view everywhere. Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jetha are attempting to point out that there is a different pattern from what you've been told, if only you look.

On the upside, they do an outstanding job of debunking specious research -- the type that's meant to "prove" that monogamy is universally "natural and appropriate", and therefore obligatory, for all human beings. On the downside, they end their book re-enforcing one of the most maddening stereotypes of male/female norms, that "men" are naturally non-monogamous, and "women" should just deal with it.

Bad science has been used for hundreds of years to promote the most preposterous (at least to our modern understanding) concepts. The "scientific proof" of racial inferiority or superiority for that matter, instantly springs to mind. Having read a lot of it, most of it is now almost laughable if it wasn't for the immense suffering it caused (e.g. slavery, the Holocaust). However, the fact that the research about sexual norms and mores is almost always paired with a political or religious agenda is rarely seen in "common" society as reason so discount it. Even when vast amounts of personal experience shows that something isn't true (e.g. monogamy is natural, therefore desirable, therefore easily attainable), as a society we insist on trying to prove what the most cursory glance around tells us is untrue. It would be like insisting that Spring is perpetual when every Winter proves otherwise.

But the downside bothered me and bothered me greatly. First, I take issue with any concept that appears to equate "men" with "all men" and "women" with "all women." I realize that for the sake of not torturing the English language, sometimes an absolute phrase is necessary where in fact, a little more nuance is accurate BUT, when it came to a man's "natural" predisposition, it too, was simply not true. Maybe a lot of men share an overwhelming urge for a large variety of sexual partners, hell, maybe even most men, but it is not true that ALL do. The implication is that if a man doesn't, or has an interest in fewer, or even one, then somehow he is "abnormal" or in some way even "deficient."

This is part of our problem in the swinging community. There is no way, not ever, that we can explain to any potential partners that it's more likely that Vince isn't attracted to the woman than I'm not attracted to either. "Reticence" on my part would be considered normal and therefore excused. "Reticence" on his part would be considered abnormal, insulting, or even "un-manly." It puts tremendous pressure on him, and dishonest restraint on me.

Chapter twenty-one, titled "The Pervert's Lament", focuses almost exclusively on the frustrations deleterious effects of suppressed male desire with very little, if any, mention of the negative effects of suppressed female sexual expression and desire. For a gal like me, this is fucking maddening. The woman is encouraged to understand the basis for the man's thoughts and behavior, to see them as natural, healthy, and not-necessarily threatening to the security of the marriage. AT NO TIME, though, is the opposite even mentioned -- the idea that the woman, wife, female craving sexual variety is not un-natural nor does it have to be threatening to a relationship, that eliminating it is futile, that limiting it is sad at best and cruel at worst. There is no exhortation to a husband to NOT see his wife's interest in other sexual experiences as simply that, a desire for sexual experience or expression that may be as rooted in biology and evolution as our desire to eat and breathe.

It is a serious omission in an otherwise outstanding book.

So Vince and I will continue to navigate our way with me as a "not-so-average" woman and him as the "doesn't fit the stereotype" guy. We both know we're damn lucky to have each other and we are doing our level best to help each other have the richest and most rewarding ride through this life as we can. Navigating our sex life may be a struggle, but our love and commitment to each other is as natural as can be.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

HNT -- Sex at Dawn

Okay, so it wasn't exactly dawn but it WAS morning!
This is one of Vince's favorite views and I have to say, it ain't half bad. There was a time, not too long ago, when I would have rather died than let a photo like this be taken of me. Indeed, I would have rather ripped an arm off rather than have sex in daylight. Good lordy, has my point of view changed.

Interestingly, I'm still heavier than I was in my prime, about 25 or so pounds to lose, but DAMN that is one sexy figure. Is it really mine? Is this why my beloved kept telling me how great I looked in reverse cowboy? Why it's one of his favorites? Is this really me?

You bet your sweet ass it is.

Happy HNT, one and all! Don't forget to check out the rest over at Osbasso's place!

47-365 Fifty years

Yesterday my in-laws celebrated fifty years of marriage. And below is the their wrapped present.
I'm quite the wrapper. I love getting all "creative" but more importantly it reflects one of the best lessons my grandmother ever taught me -- (said with a very slow southern drawl) "For heaven's sake, child, show somebody you care."

She used the admonishment if were undertaking any task and not doing our best. It is why, she told us, you dress nicely, prepare food well and serve it on the good china, keep a nice home, and wrap lovely presents. All things, but especially food and gifts should be presented in their best light, taking time to be thoughtful and letting the other person know that they matter enough for you to give a damn.

She was horrified by "gift bags" that started becoming popular in the early 80s. She hated it when people dressed "slovenly" to go to church, supper, or even shopping. "Caring isn't convenient" she'd say. If we'd stop at Kentucky Fried Chicken after church, EVERYTHING got transferred to serving platters and bowls before we sat down and said grace and commenced to eating with our bare hands. (Finger lickin' good!)

Not doing your best for those around you wasn't considered just sad, it was considered insulting. Strangely, lots of folks to that in their marriages -- stop dressing well, eating well, giving small gifts presented thoughtfully -- those acts of caring that make simple things gracious.

Sadly, her life wasn't exactly filled with warmth and caring. In fact, it was a pretty cold, dark place. Her 50+ year marriage was the same. If there was ever any caring between her and my grandfather I never saw it. They slept in separate rooms, rarely spoke and if they did it was generally something cold and cutting. She had no friends and in fact almost never left her house. But you know what? There were still a TON of people if I say, "They were married 50 years" those folks will stupidly slap huge congratulatory smile on their face and respond "Wow. Isn't that great!"

No. Not really.

In a casual FB mention of the anniversary dinner someone made one of those stupid comments and I, ahem, pointed out the error in the thinking. My in-laws marriage aside, I truly believe that a "long" marriage doesn't necessarily equate to a good one and some folks should do themselves and the rest of us a favor and throw in the damn towel. Yes, there's something to be said for pushing through the challenges that growth brings; sure, not every day is sunshine and flowers. But their should be mutual growth and not mutual destruction and more days should have sunshine than not.

In the end, I just don't see a lot to celebrate in a marriage that does little more than provide a forum for mutual hostility and seething resentment. And when I do encounter those folks -- and I'm working hard to be in their number -- who've enjoyed, not endured, fifteen or fifty years of wedded wonder, I'll be thrilled and honored to celebrate that!

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

46-365 Such a nerd!

Happy Valentine's Day to ME!! Yes, dear readers, Vince gave me the perfect gift!



I am, unapologetically, a nerd.


Incidentally, I occasionally have bouts of sleeplessness and last night was one of 'em. Instead of my usual routine of going downstairs and channel surfing until I found a "Cops" marathon, I continued reading my delightful new book. On the upside, you can get A LOT of reading done between the hours of 2:30am and 6:30am. On the downside, I feel like crap today and tonight is my in-laws' 50th wedding anniversary dinner.



I feel a nap coming in my not-too-distant future.

Monday, February 14, 2011

45-365 Dragons

From previously posted images, you probably already know that I like to see images and faces in things. In fact, I'm one of those people who can be entertained for hours watching clouds change shape. It's not that I'm dreamy, it's that I see patterns. Sometimes they just seem to leap out and make me laugh. Other times, I'll look at something I've seen every day and suddenly the image just materializes. Maybe that's why I dig the collage artwork from Nude Nite so much and not such a fan of abstract imagry where there isn't supposed to be anything "there" there.

Anywhoo, this was actually something pointed out by Vince as we were hanging out in his studio last night. He also sees images and shapes and yes, we have been known to enjoy watching clouds every once in a while.

Dragons.
The photo above it the most obvious but the one below reminds of an old time, black and white film like "Nosferatu" or "Phantom of the Opera." Can't you just hear the spooky organ music playing in the background?
I'm took these pics and Vince was having an on-line chat with another apparently flaky swinger-site husband. The details aren't important but let's just say this one, with the "oh heck yeah my wife is TOTALLY hawt and into this" but somehow she can't answer an email or have a chat or doesn't have a freakin' phone is just workin' my last nerve. Whatever, dude. Look, YOU contacted US.
Sigh.
But enough of that! This wonderful Valentine's day morning, Vince brightened my mood with perfect gift! I'll show you what it is tomorrow. ;) I'll just say that he knows his little sex-nerd wife VERY well.

Sunday, February 13, 2011

44-365 Kicking back... and guess who the f*#k shows up?

Just in case you were thinking life on Ivey Lane is nuthin' but sexy art parties, belly dancers, and night clubs, I'll have you know I DO kick back every once in while. Okay, more often than I care to think about. And what does the uber-sexy and sultry Ivey Lane lounge about in? Lacy lingerie? Armani or Yves St. Laurent? Um, no.

Baggy sweat pants, mismatched socks, and bang-around old Sketcher shoes.Rather than join Vince at his gig last night I decided to just hang out at the house, read a book, and sip a little solo Chardonnay. And guess what? One of the couples we've written off showed up at the club. A&J from this post. Seriously. Vince looks down from the stage and there's "A", waving and smiling. After the set they say hello, she asks where I was, at some point she sent me a text.

Whatever.

Damn fuckin' shame, too. Vince really liked this gal and I thought her husband was charming. Why do we seem to be flake magnets? Or is it us? I find maybe one in ten guys attractive; Vince, one in a hundred women. Should we just embrace the fact that we're snobbish? The above photo not-with-standing, we're not bad to look at; we're funny, witty, have all our own teeth. I hate to think I really AM destined for the mundane life but holy-mother-of-gawd this seems to be a lot simpler for other people.

What-the-fuck-ever. I'm whining. Really. It's been a great couple of days. I've got my sexy back, Vince and I've been having a ball; work is good, friends are great. It's all good. Except.... fuck!

I was on my own again today and decided to take myself shopping. A little retail therapy does a body good! Even if it was just bras and underwear. Matching sets, of course! :)

Saturday, February 12, 2011

43-365 Nude Nite 2011

Holy schnikes, bat-kids! It's been a YEAR since our last Nude Nite outing?! My, my, my how time flies.

For those of you who've joined the Lane more recently, last year as Vince and I were starting our journey we discovered Nude Nite, an art show in Central Florida dedicated to the human nude. If you want to learn a little more about where we were a year ago, click here. It rolled around again and man, did it really show what a hell of a year we've had! It also made me realize I missed my one-year blogosversary; I'll write on that soon.

First, the bad news; Vince couldn't go with me this time. He has a gig in another town this weekend so I was on my own. But not entirely! I went out with one of my spicy-vanilla girlfriends and we had a ball. (FYI -- "Spicy-vanilla" means folks that I know who are artsy and pretty freakin' broadminded, but who have no idea about our private interests.)

The place was crazy-packed. We had to wait in line 20 minutes to get in and then, since I didn't have the presence of mind to use the restroom before we left the bar we'd been at, I stood in line another 20 minutes or so for the, ahem, facilities. The event is usually held in a warehouse and this year's was larger than last. I think there was at least a thousand people there. (And four toilets.)
The quality of the art varied. Some of it was fantastic though WAY out of my price range. Most of it was "pretty" but mediocre. The rest, I swear to god if there hadn't been tits on the canvas NO ONE would ever show it in a gallery. It was just, bad.

But here's a piece of really good. This is a collage created entirely of newspaper and magazine pages, ripped up then decoupaged onto the canvas. If you stand close, it's hard to figure out what you're looking at. When you stand back, the image is revealed. Price tag? $5,200.00. The thing is though, I think most of the works were overpriced, even the good stuff. In the entire show I only saw one item marked "sold" and it was a nice piece on a modest sized canvas, in the $500 range.
The other challenge is that either very few artists do works of the male nude (I swear 13Messages, you could make a killing here!) OR the curator of this show is all about females. The piece below was another wonderful series; the were four large canvases and it's a charcoal drawing. The form is almost life-sized.

This was just fun! The tagger created the art on the wall and the woman throughout the night. But I gotta tell ya, some of these folks acted as if they've never seen a naked chick in their lives. In addition to the paintings, photographs, and sculptures, (and I'm not referring to this artist who was working) there were nude performances throughout the space -- a pole dancer, burlesque dancer, some woman in a cage (WTF), nekkid people just walking around. The crowd would mass around these performers every time they showed up, snapping pics, and being generally in the freakin' way. Sorry I couldn't elbow my way to the front to get a better shot.
This is another piece by my favorite artist of the night. Again, it's made up entirely of newspapers and magazine pages but this thing is HUGE. It's hard to see, but it's actually a total of twelve 4'x4' panels, so it's eight feet wide and sixteen feet tall. But it's also gorgeous, gritty, and above all interesting!

Vince and I were texting back and forth throughout the night. He was at a club surrounded by stylish and sexy ladies, I was wandering around a sexy and provocative art show, and both of us wished the other was where we were. I had fun with my girlfriend and he had a great time with the band, but being together just makes everything that much funnier, sexier, more enjoyable. As I was wandering about I recognized a number of swinger-folks from the website, though none that we're interested in. There were a lot of people who were there for the scene -- and to be seen at a "nude art" show -- who you could tell were more about posing and pretentiousness than anything else. Vince shares my sense of humor and my sensibilities. He takes the edge off my aversion to crowds. He entertains me when I'm stuck in a line for the bathroom. We just .... suit each other.
It was an enjoyable night, but one thing would have made it better -- my beloved Vincent by my side.

Friday, February 11, 2011

41&42-365 Ego stroke

It's been a great couple of days. The kind where a series of unrelated events combine to pump up your ego in rich and meaningful ways.

On Wednesday I had to meet with a client. On the drive I had the opportunity to catch up with a friend who knows not only about Ivey Lane but more the real-life me and Vince as well. It was a great conversation overall and one of the topics turned to ego. The good kind. The kind that motivates and encourages. It's true that I'm interested in sexual adventure (as well as LIFE adventure) for experiences and sensations it produces all by itself, for the freedom of expression, for the individual connections.

But a big part of my motivation has to do with the fact that I want that for other people, primarily Vincent. I take immense pride in being the kind of wife that adds to his happiness, not the kind that harps, and bitches, and limits, and scolds, and generally becomes the proverbial "ball and chain" that so many men (and women) live with every day of their fucking lives.

My ego is driven by helping to make peoples lives fully, richer, and more rewarding than they thought possible, in every way I can.

Which brings me to the photos. This first was taken near my client's office. They are happy. They are very happy. They are incredibly happy with me because after several years of false starts and crappy results, they finally brought Vince and I into the project and are finally getting what they want, what they had a hard time articulating, and what their previous vendors couldn't or didn't deliver.
FYI -- the photo above is a ruin of slave quarters on an old plantation. Vince and I get to travel around a bit and we take photos all over the country. I might start a series and call it "Somewhere in America" and add a few of these to Proj365. This photo reminds me that throughout history and even today, there are people who don't have choices or opportunities; who were and are forced to live lives by the whims and dictates of others. And in the end, it all turns back into dust. If you have opportunities in your life and choose not to take them, that's just sad. But if you disallow others, especially those you profess to love, from experiencing all that life has to offer, especially because of your own fear and limits, because you want to keep what's "yours," then you may be more of an asshole than you realize.

The next day, Thursday, was tax prep day. We met with our accountant to go over last year and plan for this one. She rescues cats. Lots of them. This lovely, FAT, HEAVY baby is laying on my arm, which he did for about 45 minutes. My fingers were as asleep as this guy by the end of the meeting!
But it was a good year and this one is shaping up to be even better. Part of the additional ego stroking is that we are reaping some of the rewards of the years of effort we've put into our work and business. In fact, my biggest concern right now isn't whether or not we're going to have jobs this year, but rather how in the hell are we going to get it all done without killing ourselves! As you can see, the tax cat isn't concerned.
After our meeting we just spent the day running errands, hanging out together as we drove all over town. We ended up a cool little restaurant that had nice entertainment in addition to great food. And yes, Ivey's getting her sexy back! Yes!!

We spent the evening flirting with each other, thinking about other people we may (or may not) be meeting. We chatted about the strangeness of it all as well as the adventure. We talked a little about some of our new friends and how much we enjoy them. We laughed as we thought about the "if they only knew!" quality of some of our older, more established friendships. We talked about possibilities and all of life's adventures that are on their way. Not just sex (though it's a significant part!), but work, travel, life. And I felt damn good. So good in fact that we came home, I put on one of my new sexy ensembles that I bought at Christmas just for Vince. We went up to our little love nest and fucked and laughed and giggled and moaned and kissed and just had ourselves a fine old time.
And this morning, we woke up and did it again. If that won't stroke your ego, nuthin' will.


Wednesday, February 9, 2011

39&40/365 Grey days

It's been grey and raining here for over a week (yuck) and I think that's been contributing to my grey mood. I know, I know. "Ivey, quit whining about a little overcast skies while you're out riding your bike in shorts in January, you bee-atch. You don't know what grey IS!" And you're right. Compared to the type of winter most of you folks are having, I've decided that I need a big ol' dose of STFU.

So Monday I took this pic and reminded myself how pretty and peaceful it can be when that mist hangs in the air, the trail is empty because lots of people are concerned about rain, and the temperature is about 60 degrees.
But that's not the only grey that's bee lingering around. Ladies, it was time to get my luscious locks whipped back into shape, too. I usually do my own color at home -- primarily because I'm a Scot and have a deep, genetic aversion to spending money frivolously -- but lately my tresses have been less than luxurious and getting a little damaged so I decided to spend the cash and have a pro handle the situation. Here I am, half way through a hundred and thirty freakin' bucks.

BTW -- This is my "natural" color. I told the gal I didn't want to see any difference between my roots and the rest of my hair this time. And I'm thinking that for HNT, I'll show you how it turned out!
Also BTW -- the weather here has returned to sunny and seventies! Those of you in the frigid North should really consider jumping on a plane for a couple of days. I promise, it will lift your spirits!

Monday, February 7, 2011

A hundred questions

I have the night to myself and was inspired by my girls Minority Report and Another Suburban Mom. I know it isn't Sunday, but I can't be tied to a calendar when I'm inspired. So for something that ISN'T Proj365, I present -- Ivey answers a hundred questions.

Enjoy!

1 -- One of your scars, how did you get it? -- I have many scars. I'm an active chick and not exactly coordinated BUT I have a scar on my left knee from from a wipe out on my bicycle. I was coming home from a ride and my neighbor pulled out of his driveway in front of me. It happened the morning that I met the two people who launched us on this wacky journey.

2 -- What is on the walls of your room? -- I have tons of stuff on my walls but I'm going to pick my bedroom. I have a series of our HNT photos and two beautiful nudes. Our bedroom is a love-nest and I like it that way.

3 -- Do you snore, grind your teeth, or talk in your sleep? -- Not usually, though Vince says I've been know to snore on occasion. Until I hear the tape, I refuse to believe it. I am a delicate Southern Flower; I DO NOT snore. ('nuf!)

4 -- What type of music do you listen to? -- On the radio, I'm a fan of club music (e.g. Lady Gaga), at home, it's Vince. He noodles on his guitars in the morning and I often wake up to the sound of live jazz.

5 -- What time were you born? -- 6:00am. And I think that was the last time I was productive at that hour.

6 -- What do you want more than anything right now? -- Hard to say. I don't want things, business is going well. Lately I've been in a bit of a sexual funk so I'd say I want my roaring libido back. But I think things are once again on the upswing there so that "want" is short lived.

7 -- What do you miss? -- My granddaddy. My daddy from before his stroke.

8 -- What is your most prized possession? -- My grandmother's diaries from the 1920s. She was an amazing woman that lost her way.

9 -- How tall are you? -- 5'7"

10 -- Do you get claustrophobic? -- No. Except I hate the press of large crowds. I don't know if that's claustrophobia or just annoyance.

11 -- Do you get scared in the dark? -- No.

12 -- The last person to make you cry? -- I cry at coffee commercials, never watch Animal Planet, and on and on. I'm a big ol' softy but I got misty in "The King's Speech." The last person who really made me cry was this.

13 -- What's your worst fear? -- I actually have three. In descending order: Dying poor, dying without ever having lived fully, living without Vince.

14 -- What kind of hair/eye color do you like on people you're attracted to? -- Brunette's with blue or green eyes. Uhm, that would be Vince.

15 -- Where can you see yourself proposing? -- Proposing what? A new business venture? A hairball scheme? Oh, you meant marriage. Well, as the girl, I never imagined that. Yeah, I'm kinda old fashioned like that. But I did leave Vince PLENTY of hints and he proposed at my home, on my birthday, after a day at our local art museums. I DEFINITELY cried that day! Tears of joy. :)

16 -- Coffee or energy drink? -- Coffee baby. Love the go-juice!

17 -- Favorite pizza topping? -- Peperoni, mushrooms, onions, garlic, and LOTS of cheese. Bring on the luvin's!

18 -- If you could eat anything right now, what would it be? -- A favorite food? My favorite food, I kid you not, is Fordhook Lima Beans. I could eat them until I explode.

19 -- Favorite color of all time? -- A deep, rich green.

20 -- Have you ever eaten a goldfish? -- Ew. No. Gross.

21 -- What is the first meaningful gift you ever received? -- A pony when I was 10. Her name was Beauty and she was all black with a white blaze on her forehead and white socks on her front hooves.

22 -- Do you have a crush? -- Have you been reading this blog? Hell yes! I have tons of crushes. All of them wonderful!

23 -- Are you double jointed? -- Not in the least.

24 -- Favorite clothing brand? -- I don't really have any "brand" type clothes, though I do tend to shop at Cold Water Creek quite a bit.

25 -- Who is your favorite female/male celebrity? -- Strange perhaps for a former actress, but I don't particularly care for celebrities.

26 -- Do you have a pet right now? -- Alas, no. We lost both of our beloved dogs to old age a couple of years ago. With no children, it was a crushing loss. Since we travel so much, we haven't gotten new ones. Though I do live vicariously through my friend's pets and my blogger friends' pics. (Go Owen!)

27 -- What kind is it? -- We had a collie (a full on Lassie, though he was all boy-boy) and a mutt (a Retriever/Ridgeback mix.)

28 -- Would you fall in love knowing that the person is leaving? -- Probably not. I'd fall in lust, or friendship, but no I wouldn't fall in love. Though is you caught the drift of my answer to #3, I'll always be in love with Vince.

29 -- (I copied this list and this question was missing)

30 -- Say a number from one to a hundred. -- 14

31 -- Blondes or Brunettes? -- For what? I dig brunettes but I hear blonds can be fun too.

32 -- Favorite quote? -- "Teach your child to live, rather than to avoid death; live is not breath, but action." -- Rousseau

33 -- Favorite place? -- The lake where I grew up. Incidentally, where I got married as well.

34 -- Have you been out of your home country? -- Oh hell yes. Mexico, Canada, England, France, Germany (East and West when there still was an "East"), Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Finland, Switzerland, Italy, Bahamas. Seriously want to go to South and Central America and most definitely Asia.

35 -- Weaknesses? -- Holy shit. Of course I have weaknesses. But I usually think that my greatest weaknesses are my greatest strengths gone too far. For example, I'm very direct; unchecked, I can be quite thoughtless or mean. I'm very adventurous; unchecked, I can be reckless.

36 -- (Again, it appears a question is missing.)

37 -- First job? -- When I was 15 I taught swimming, was a life guard, and was a piano player at our local theatre. I'm not sure which came first. And I've never been without a job when I wanted one for more than a day since. But when I was a smaller kid, starting around age 12 or so, I used to pick blackberries to sell. I made a wad of money though I have to say, paying for the bandaids from dealing with the thorns cut in to my profit margin.

38 -- Ever done a prank call? -- Nope.

39 -- Do you think everyone has a soul mate? -- In fact, I think we all have many.

40 -- What were you doing before you did Stealing? -- Dealing with a crazy family member.

41 -- Have you ever had surgery? -- 1976 - Appendix, 1996 - vocal nodes, 2006 - gall bladder.

42 -- What do you get complimented the most about? -- In general, my house, second, my dinner parties; from the ladies, Vince.

43 -- Have you ever had braces? -- Have you seen my smile on HNT? Hell yes. Sixth through ninth grade baby. Full rhinoceros plates. If you know that term, then you are OLD.

44 -- What do you want for your birthday? -- My birthday is in December. I haven't a clue at this point.

45 -- How many kids do you want and what do you want there names to be? -- Next.

46 -- Were you named after anyone? -- HAHAHAHAHA! If you know my real name, you'd know the answer to that! The short answer is "no."

47 -- What is the biggest turn off of the sex(es) you're attracted to? -- #1-Rudeness. Especially to people who can do you no harm like servers or ticket takers. Good Lord do I hate that particular type of asshole. #2- Negativity, as in someone who always looks for the downside to every fucking thing. Drives. Me. Nuts.

48 -- What is the one thing you like about high school? -- Band.

49 -- What kind of shampoo do you use? -- Pantene or Suave. Whatever is ultra-moisturizing.

50 -- Do you like your handwriting? -- I can't READ my handwriting. So know, I'd say I don't like it.

51 -- What is your favorite lunch meat? -- Roast beef.

52 -- Any bad habits? -- Oh, my. Several. But do we really need to bring that up?

53 -- Are you a jealous person? -- Not at all.

54 -- If you were another person, would you be friends with you? -- Poorly phrased question. I'd say, if I were another person, would I be friends with that person? Answer -- It depends on whether or not I was an ass.

55 -- Do you agree with friends with benefits? -- Absolutely. In fact, I think it's one of the most interesting things two people can do together. We are talking about "sex" benefits right? Not health care or comp time?

56 -- Do looks matter? -- Yes in that the "other" person's looks have to fall within an acceptable range to you. Do my looks matter to me? Abso-fuckin'-lutely. They matter to me a lot! And I think looks in general matter in the world but not like model good looks. I mean, do you dress and groom yourself like you care? Do you make an effort to be attractive as in you're the best YOU you can be? Are your clothes clean, do you stand up straight? Do you look people in the eye? Do you smile? Fuck yes, those things matter.

57 -- How do you release anger? -- I work out. I used to take karate and that was awesome (damn joint pain!). Hitting things/people was a great anger release valve.

58 -- Would you rather gain 58 pounds or lose 58 pounds? -- LOSE! Actually, I only need to lose 25 pounds to be smack in the middle of my "normal" range.

59 -- What's your main goal in life? -- To experience everything I can. To die knowing that I experienced as much of this life as I could.

60 -- What was your favorite toy as a child? -- This is pathetic, but we really didn't have "toys." (I just stopped typing for like, five minutes trying to think of something.) Shit. We didn't have toys.

61 -- How many number are in your cell phone? -- More than I fuckin' need, I'll tell you that.

62 -- Were you a fan of Barney as a little kid? -- Wow. You are sooooo far out of my time frame.

63 -- Do you use sarcasm? -- No, not really. I use hyperbole but I'm not sarcastic.

64 -- Mashed potatoes or macaroni and cheese? -- Both! But only when I cook them from scratch. I'm not a fan of the "boxed" version of either.

65 -- What do you look for in a lover? -- Make me laugh, baby.

66 -- What are your nicknames? -- I'm so not going there!

67 -- Favorite super power? -- Read minds.

68 -- What's your favorite TV show? -- "The Closer" is my top choice. After that, (face in palm) America's Funniest Videos. Nothing makes me laugh harder than someone, who's being completely earnest, getting hit in the head and falling down. Ask Vince.

69 -- What's the best way to deal with people that you don't like? -- It depends. If I don't have to deal with them, then it's best to avoid them. If it's someone I have to deal with for work or family reasons, then for my own sanity it's best for me to be direct. Though generally, the one thing that will make me dislike someone is rudeness. In that case, I call people on it immediately.

70 -- What's your favorite ice cream flavor? -- Chocolate. If you make it a malt them I'm in heaven. Add some chocolate sprinkles then I'll totally blow you. Seriously.

71 -- Do you have all of your finger and toes? -- Yes.

72 -- So is it going to be the Steelers or the Packers? -- Since I wrote this after the Superbowl, I have to say "Packers."

73 -- Plans for tonight? -- Nope. Husband is out and I'm just hanging out.

74 -- Where do you want to live when you retire? -- Costa Rica.

75 -- Do you want everyone to answer these questions? -- No. I don't give a rat's ass about "everyone."

76 -- What are you listening to? -- Night sounds. The window is open.

77 -- Last thing you drank? -- Currently nursing a nice Cabernet.

78 -- Last person you talked to on the phone? -- My brother.

79 -- The first thing you notice in the sex(es) you're attracted to? -- (Before I answer that, I have to say adding "es" get annoying, though I guess it is necessary.) Smile.

80 -- What do you like to do in your spare time? -- Read. I read A LOT.

81 -- Favorite thing to hate? -- I dunno. Hate is a mighty strong term. Though if I give it some thought I'd have to say bullies. I hate bullies with the white hot passion of a thousand suns.

82 -- Favorite season of the year? -- It's a toss-up: Fall and Christmas.

83 -- What's your favorite type of candy? -- Kisses with Almonds.

84 -- Have you ever really and truly had a best friend? -- Yes. The hokey answer is Vince, though he is so much more. But I also have, and have had, several people who I would definitely call truly "best friends." They are miracles.

85 -- What is your hair color? -- Dark brown. (With all the fuckin' grey covered!)

86 -- What is your eye color? -- Dark brown.

87 --Shoe size? -- 9.

88 -- Favorite fast food place? -- Five Guys Hamburgers. I swear, if I'm going to have a burger and fries, it's going to be from this place. Awesome!!

89 -- Favorite restaurant? -- Vince and I tend to eat at Mom and Pop type places. I have several in my area and yes, they are all favorites.

90 -- Do you like sushi? -- No. I don't eat fish of any sort.

91 -- Watch TV Today? -- Yes, on my never ending quest for real news. I was disappointed in US journalism once again. Sigh.

92 -- Favorite day of the year? -- I don't really have a "favorite" day as in a "date." My favorite day involves sunshine, Vince, a motorcycle, and some really cool place to go.

93 -- Play any musical instruments? -- Piano, flute, a little guitar.

94 -- Political party? -- Independent. I lean conservative on money matters and liberal on social issues.

95 -- Kisses or hugs? -- Depends. From some people I want kisses, from others, hugs.

96 -- Relationships or one night stands? -- To be honest, I like both and that one's hard to answer. My primary relationship is with Vince; he's who I want to travel the long road with. But I don't want to miss opportunities for connection and some of those connections only have a one night shelf life. But for the most part, if you're referring to sex (and I think you are) I only want to have sex with people who I have at least a friendly relationship with. Make sense?

97 -- What was the last thing you bought? -- Half and Half at the local convenience store. We were out.

98 -- Would you ever be a house spouse? -- I'm stumped here. We both work from home so technically, we both are "house spouses." But do you mean, sit at home not earning money while the other earns it all? That doesn't sound like me but only because I like to "do" things and I expect to be paid for what I do.

99 -- What book are you reading? -- Currently, I'm reading "American Rose: The life and times of Gypsy Rose Lee." However, that's not my normal genre. My next book coming from the library is "The Sentry" by Robert Crais.

100 -- Describe your love life. -- My love life with Vince is inspiring! My sex life is expanding. My love of all life is growing beyond my wildest imagination. In the end, it's all about love baby. And that, my friends, is my life.

38-365 Enough already!

I'm pretty confident that my beloved readers are about as sick of "home improvement photos" as I am of working on the project. The good news -- we're nearing the end. Here Vince is gently tapping in the finishing nails for the previously pictured (37-365) refinished shoe mould.

Geez folks, this is just a rental.

But I expect we'll be done soon enough. After spending this morning working I'm going to become the clean-up crew this afternoon and by this time tomorrow, I expect it'll all be done.

On another note, I thought the game yesterday was a good one. First, congrats to all the Packers fans out there. Second, what do you expect when you get a twit like Christina Aguilerra to sing the national anthem? Can we please get the country stars? At least they tend to know the words, sing it well, and with respect. The half time show? Puh-leaze! As Vince said, he thought that with all the folks in white spandex circling the giant round stage, they could've named it "Insemination: the Musical" and had it at least make visual sense.

Catch you lovely folks later! I think I'm feeling a twinge of sexy coming on and Vince just walked in the back door. Gotta go!!

Sunday, February 6, 2011

37-365 Wild Kingdom

Just because I'm in a teeny lil' ol' sexual slump doesn't mean that life isn't both interesting and productive!

Taking my exercise deficit seriously, the first thing on yesterday's agenda was a bike ride. There's a certain farm along this trail that raises the most interesting creatures. I think these two are Ibex but I'm not sure. (If you know, please chime in!) They were nice enough to pose for a photo though. :)
There are also numerous orange groves in the area and now's the time to get the pollination thing going. Below are some of the industrious bee's hives that get the job done. Notice, I didn't get too close for this one! But in a month or two the incredible aroma of orange blossoms will soon fill the air. I can't wait!

(FYI -- the above photo is actually the one I meant to take on my ride Thursday and forgot. So while it's not officially 35-365, it kinda is.)
Vince and I spent the rest of the day working on our garage apartment. With the floors finally refinished ("It's done! I'm NOT putting another f*#kin' coat down, Ivey!!"), I started touching up the trim paint.
Meanwhile, Vince spent his time salvaging some old shoe mould to put down in the dinning room area. Cleaned and sanded, it's now ready for a little polyurethane!
Today is pretty much going to be a repeat of yesterday and then it's off to the in-laws for the Super Bowl. Vince is originally from Pittsburgh, so that's where our allegiances lie. I truly think there's some blood oath those folks have to take when they have a child, swearing to raise them to be devoted home team fans.

Hope you're all having a wonderful weekend!

Saturday, February 5, 2011

36-365 Night drive

Yesterday was my parents 49th wedding anniversary. I've already been informed that next year's blowout better be impressive so I expect to start the party planning tomorrow. Of course, as we were driving home from dinner, I realized I hadn't taken a photo; this shot is the result of my procrastination.
It's kind of fitting though. Some of you may have noticed a reduced amount of flirtiness from me lately, a certain quietness on all things sex-ay. Truth is, I think I'm in a bit of a slump. And since I am me, this has given me a few things to think about.

1. "Lower libido" does not feel like "I'm to busy/stressed/annoyed or whatever" for sex. I read a lot of blogs and comments where folks will say something along the lines of "I've just been to busy for sex." or "The kids are stressing me out and I'm not interested in sex." Mmmmmm.... I don't think so, or at least, not for me. It's one thing for me to be too busy or too tired, but that's not the same AT ALL. In those times, I still think about it (a lot!) and I can be turned on with a simple raised eyebrow. Right now, it's like it doesn't cross my mind. I hate that. I prefer the feeling of being revved all the time.

2. It's across the board disinterest. Again, there are people I read who aren't interested in sex with their spouse, but are with other people. To me, this isn't low libido at all but rather relationship issues. In my recent case, even my favorite fantasy fellas (and gals) aren't on my sexy radar either. (Sorry!) The warmth, affection, and friendship is still there, as is my deep and abiding love for my beloved Vince, but that extra jolt is somehow "missing." Dammit!!

3. It "feels" temporary, though I'm concerned it isn't because I've had a low libido problem before. That scares me witless. The good news though, is that opposed to how we managed things in the past, Vince and I are able to talk about it this time, address it, figure it out, and move on through it. It feels more like a solvable situation, rather than "a problem," and that's good.

4. I think it may have something to do with exercise or rather, a reduced amount of it. When I first had my "recovery" a few years back, it coincided with my return to cardiovascular exercise, in my case, bike riding, and aggressive work outs, like karate. Lately, I haven't been on my bike as much due to the cold and the crazy (family) and I had to quit karate due to some joint issues. But the weather as straightened out, at least down here, and I'm going to step it up and see if there's any improvement. It's funny, I'll whine about gaining a pound or two, but will PANIC at the thought of Miss Kitty losing her purr.

5. But my deepest fear is I think it may be due, in part, to the the lack of activity on the sexy-adventure front. There is something intensely invigorating to me not only about potential, but action as well, however as a friend said, "if it isn't relatively easy then maybe it isn't for you." Six months ago, I decided to step back and stop pushing so much. On the good side, my frustration with lack of action has gone down. On the bad side, my interest in it is waning. I dont' think it's because this curiosity or drive for adventure is a fad or a phase, but I do think, like much of life, it's a "use it or lose it" phenomenon. It's not that my sex drive has "died," but perhaps it is returning to it's slumbering state because it woke up, decided it is still confined to a cage, and came to the conclusion that rather than railing against the bars it's better to just go lay the fuck back down.

Perhaps, for me and maybe others, my sexuality is pan-sexual in the sense that it is there or it is not. Limiting it is like trying to limit a forest fire to one tree or the ocean to a corner.

So the photo above really does kind of represent how I feel right now -- driving down a dark highway, nothing really to see, no discernible destination. The view fuzzy and out of focus. Passing surely interesting places but not bothering to stop or get to know them.

Then again, maybe I just need to go for more bike rides.